How to kick a boy in the balls

Added: Coty Degeorge - Date: 06.11.2021 15:09 - Views: 19296 - Clicks: 3263

The groin shot: an attack so devastating that men have banned it from virtually every contact sport they engage in. Let's learn how to do it. These days, only Muay Thai fighters strike to the groin—and they only do it in Thailandwhere they wear groin protection made from fucking steel. But even armor plating isn't enough for western sportsmen; in addition to groin protection devices, they shield their balls with every rule, regulation, law, and covenant they can think of.

The Unified Rules of Mixed Martial Arts, for example, list 31 official foulswith myriad subtle variations on things like kidney strikes only a foul if you kick with your heel and elbows disallowed if striking downward; OK in other directions. And then there's Item vii: "Groin attacks of any kind. It's as if the mere idea of groin attacks disturbs the rule-makers so much they're incapable of describing them in any detail. And if How to kick a boy in the balls unthinkable does happen? According to MMA rules, "a fighter who has been struck with a low blow is allowed up to five minutes to recover from the foul as long as in the ringside doctor's opinion the fighter may possibly continue on in the contest.

So fighters who take a shot to the groin have as much as an entire round to recover from it. This strikes me as oddly dainty for a sport that allows you to legally knee your opponent in the face. Even outside the rules of sport, in the world of parking lot brawls and bar fights, groin shots are taboo. They're considered "low," and "cheap," and "unsportsmanlike. It also, so the rumor goes, hurts like holy hell. All of this—the element of surprise, the psychological impact, the pain—make the groin a truly magnificent target in self defense situations.

And yet we're all, men and women alike, conditioned by society to bypass the groin as a target, to pretend it isn't there, just as we're taught to pretend that rude bodily noises are never audible at important social functions. This makes me sad. Kicking a guy in the balls, while not guaranteed to incapacitate him nothing's guaranteed in lifeis definitely one of your better options in a serious physical assault—and I say that not only as a self defense instructor, but also as a certified Emergency Medical Technician.

In terms of trauma, you get a lot of bang for your buck when you attack the groin. So let's demystify this forbidden technique. Here's how and why you should kick a guy in the balls. The self defense model I teach from frames physical response to violence within the Ethic of Least Harm. Kicking a guy in the balls, as we're about to see, can cause a lot of damage. So you should probably reserve this technique for situations where your life or bodily autonomy are in immediate danger. An interesting wrinkle for women is that such circumstances are statistically much more likely to involve someone we know, rather than a stranger.

If you happen to know any MMA fighters, your risk may be even higher, because the sport, notwithstanding its queasiness about groin shots, has seen some horrific cases of domestic abuse.

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I think most reasonable people would agree that Koppenhaver, who has a history of attacking his girlfriends, is a guy who deserves to be kicked in the balls. Though it's probably unnecessary at the moment, since he's in jail in Nevada. There's also Thiago Silva, who was cut, then reinstated, then cut again by the UFC after allegedly sticking a gun in his wife's mouth. UFC President Dana White initially took Silva back into the fold because " he was acquitted of all charges ," which turned out not to be true; the charges against Silva were dropped when his wife, in quite understandable fear for her life, fled the country.

Personally, I feel that anyone who would stick a gun in a woman's mouth deserves to have his balls kicked, viciously and repeatedly. If you disagree, you probably deserve the same treatment.

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By this simple litmus test of "Does he try to kill women? Josh Grispi gave his wife a broken wrist and a concussionand had his pit bull attack her. Will Chope slammed his ex-wide's head against the ground and attacked her with a knife. Other professional sports have their domestic violence issuesof course. MMA is hardly unique among pro sports for tolerating domestic violence while having the collective vapors over the very thought of groin shots.

But the double standard is a bit more glaring with mixed martial arts because the sport, facing a shrinking viewership, is actively seeking to build its female fan base. Well, as a fan of combat sports, I'm here to help them. I've illustrated this guide to kicking a guy in the balls with instructive video clips compiled from MMA fights. Many of them feature slow-motion replays of the ball-kicking. Ladies, sit back and enjoy yourselves. There are worse things that can happen to a man than getting kicked in the balls. From a medical standpoint, being kicked in the balls certainly beats a gunshot wound to the chest.

It's less dangerous than a spinal fracture. Definitely preferable to a depressed skull fracture. A blow to the balls can cause a lot of problems, but it's eminently survivable, especially if it's inflicted by another human. The really bad genital injuries—avulsions and amputations and de-gloving don't Google that unless you have a strong stomach are usually caused by machinery, not by people defending themselves. So, in a way, attacking the groin is a compassionate response to a guy who's trying to kill you.

Still, my EMT textbook notes that while injuries to the genitalia are "rarely life threatening," they are "typically extremely painful and could be quite embarrassing for the patient. That's true for men and women; women have a lot of nerve endings in the groin, too.

However, "injuries to the male genitalia," the EMT text goes on, choosing its words carefully, "usually produce excruciating pain and cause great concern to the patient. That's probably an understatement. A good kick to the balls doesn't just hurt the balls. Upon impact, the spermatic plexus, a major nerve running through the testicles, carries the pain upward to the abdominal cavity, which is why victims of groin kicks often double over and assume a fetal position.

They may also throw up or pass out. Crying is not unheard of. Here, for instance, is a six-minute, second video of a guy getting kicked in the balls. The kick comes at The next is the recovery. He doesn't even stand up until well past the four-minute mark. Now, this is a terrible thing to happen in a sporting event. But it would be a great thing to happen in countering an assault. Think how far away you could be by the time your attacker was back on his feet. You'd have time to hail a cab, probably. Here's a clip where the kick from Adam Glenn comes about 10 seconds in.

Seventy seconds later, the victim, Tyler How to kick a boy in the balls, still looks like he needs oxygen. Or smelling salts. It's a bad day, all around, for a guy who gets kicked in the balls. The particulars of the damage are even less appealing. Blunt trauma can cause testicular torsion, where the spermatic cord becomes twisted and blood supply to the testicle is cut off.

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This quickly in ischemia or testicular infarction and tissue death—an extremely dangerous condition if left untreated. Testicular rupture is also a possibility, accompanied by hemorrhage or scrotal hematoma. Less common, but more impressive, is testicular dislocation. It turns out those little buggers can be popped right up into the abdominal cavity if you hit them hard enough though this particular outcome is more common from motorcycle crashes than one-on-one combat.

And then there's a grab bag of other possibilities, like a lacerated urethra, or a penile fracture, when the tunica albuginea tears or ruptures, resulting in severe pain hematoma, and edema. Here's another interesting outcome: Watch heavyweight Bellator fighter Eric Prindle axe-kick Thiago Santos in the groin. The kick comes at seconds. The rest of the video is Santos writhing on the mat. Turns out Prindle's kick broke his pubic bone. Pretty ugly, isn't it? It makes me glad I'm a girl, frankly. I've spent 15 years training in karate, an art developed primarily by men and therefore obsessively concerned with protecting the testicles, so in some ways I feel like I have an honorary groin; I'm so accustomed to covering it every time I begin or end a drill.

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It's a huge responsibility, and I'm thankful I don't carry that burden in real life.

How to kick a boy in the balls

email: [email protected] - phone:(556) 134-2771 x 4935

Testicular Injuries